why can’t I sleep?
It is now exactly 3am. Whilst I am not completely wide awake, I am still sufficiently awake to think and operate. Utter exhaustion and a need to sleep has not hit yet. This is the kind of tiredness I’d ordinarily feel at least four hours ago. Instead, I am cursed with it now.
In some ways, it is a blessing. I have been able to write a near-complete character biography for my protagonist. I have been having very intriguing thoughts about my novel as a whole lately and it is making me very excited to write the whole thing. However, I am too tired to feel capable of doing any fiction writing. It never flows well when I am this tired and it is frustrating. That means I have been writing this biography, painstakingly working out the back story of one character for at least 2 hours. And now, I am too tired to even do that.
The curse side? I don’t actually know just how much sleep I will be able to obtain overnight. I’m still showing no signs of needing to sign off the internet. When I do, I’ll inevitably read a couple of chapters of my current book (Gone by Michael Grant, for anyone who is interested) and then hit the hay. But when I wake up? I’ll probably feel exhausted and irritable. That will lead to a bad headache and potentially a migraine. All of which makes writing fiction difficult.
I hope that I will stop feeling like this at night soon. The doctor insisted it was just a side effect of upping the dose of one of my medications. However, I definitely don’t seem to be showing any signs of getting used to it yet.
And yes, this post is essentially just a whine about a lack of sleep and a want to write but struggling to find the mindset to focus. Oh well.
Tracie Writes 